There are some moments when life stops. Just like that, all of a sudden. Everything around is like a movie. Is this really happening? Is it a dream? Am I in a trance? Why cant I feel any emotions at this moment? Am I in disbelief and shock? Am I insensitive? How come there are no tears? God, are you really there?
Yes, this has happened more than once in my life. Death does this to me. The first time I was hit really hard was when my father passed away, eight years ago. Those days are frozen in memory, I am forever grateful for the kind souls who helped us get through those trying times. Several other older relatives passed away in the years past. We always try to make peace with that, we reflect on their life, well lived, the good deeds they have done. We pray for their souls.
But now I have lost a 33 year old friend. Is there any explanation? The first several minutes are filled with disbelief, this cannot be true. But it is. Sometimes we have to accept the cruel deal life hands to some people. Images of my friend swim in my mind. My heart starts weeping for his family - how can they ever come to terms with this? All friends are equally shocked and numbed. Suddenly, my daily woes seem so petty. What are they compared to what my friend's family has to deal with? Slowly the tears come. Yes, we all need to cry sometimes. The pain and anguish need expression. Two days have passed. The mind wanders to his family time and again. The entire day, as I go through my motions, my mind is somewhere else.
One has to get up and move on though. Life doesnt stop. But our responsibilities dont end with shedding a few tears. We need to watch out for his family, we need to keep in touch with them. This cannot be more difficult for us than it is for them. For parents to see their child go is the most difficult thing in this world. His daughter is soon to be a year old. What memories will she have of him? How will his life partner come to terms with this harsh reality? We just have to hope that someone above is watching over and will give everyone the strength to deal with this.
I know and realize that there are far many more such stories every day. There are wars being fought, brave soldiers losing their lives. There is so much pain and sorrow that we are unmindful of. Once in a while, we are shaken. A rude awakening of the soul. Maybe we need it, maybe we do.....
